I've been on this train wreck for months and have tried pretty much everything on this thread and more
Removing external drives improves things sometimes but not consistently
Creating a whole new MBP with the account transfer wizard copied the same behavior from a MBP to a MB Air (basically the same thing as a clean install and restore from Time Machine with different hardware which excludes the hardware as a cause)
I worked through 3 drive that are mounted to my MBP as follows
Day 1 - No attached drives (Veracrypt Mounted) - overnight no processes consuming memory
Day 2 - Lightening drive attached (Veracrypt mounted) - iconservicesgent up to 3.4Gb of memory in the morning
Day 3 - USB drive attached (Veracrypt mounted) - iconservicesgent no processes consuming memory
Day 4 - USB drive attached (Veracrypt mounted) - iconservicesgent no processes consuming memory
Concurrently on Day 4 mounted the Lightening Drive into my MacBook Air which was an account clone of the MBP overnight - no processes consuming memory
The MB Air clone behaves relatively normally as long as no drives are mounted
Reformatting external drives and copying back information did not solve the problem
Killing the iconserviceagent is a short term fix and it recurs over hours an the persistence fo the memory it consumes that climbs to >9Gb one morning with nothing running overnight is debilitating and unsustainable on a MBP that has max memory of 16Gb
Day to day challenges occur with frequency that brings the machines to their knees with 10 secs to open a file 13 secs to open a word document of one page - waiting 5 mins to regain control and kill everything and kill tconservicesgent restores some level of usability and enough to reboot the Mac to bring normal operations for a limited period
Rebooting has been the only viable fix and has been required up to x3 per day to keep the machines operating
A Clean system/fresh install and restore of files & account via Time Machine failed to resolve the problem
Total wipe of hard drive and fresh install of OSx and setting up the account from scratch importing no settings and going through 2 weeks of adding back most of the applications and data manually worked for a period of time but the behavior has returned with Iconservicesgent now persisting with holding Gb's of memory when left running overnight
If I have custom Icons I am not aware of them except for 2 external drives and 1 VeraCrypt Drive container icon that are custom to differentiate them visually.
Based on the above I believe I can rule out hardware faults, rule out OS corruption on my setup which leaves OSx bug that affects a small minority of users or maybe it is more but others are unaware, or have desktop machine with more memory so its impact is diminished and they just hard reboot without knowing why they have to, or they don't have attached external drives so the problem does not occur
I had detailed discussions with Apple support who guided me through the testing of the above and at the last point of contact said the next step is to bring it in as it must be hardware.
The external drives are the key problem and in my case the drive connected via Lightening which was not resolved when I wiped and reformatted it and currently it contains 1 directory and consuming <1% of the space that was in use before. The return of the behavior is not as large as before - so iconservicesagent consumes Memory and holds it forever but has not risen above 2Gb overnight so the effect appears to be proportional to the number of files and imo has nothing to do with actual custom icons. The one directory is my Mobilesync directory offloaded from the main drive using a symlink to relocate the huge backup consuming space from syncing my iPhone and iPad to my Mac and storing backups
Hope this helps someone