I think I found The ultimate solution: using the original USB-C to lightning cable coming up with the iPhone 11 Pro Max, then purchase a USB-C female to USB male.
it works!!!
I have a been troubled by this connection issue since November 8, 2019. I have a tried below solutions and it just works sometimes:
1, using a new lightning cable coming with the AirPods 2 box, it only works 20% of the chance
2, I read on the thread from the forms that I will need to reset the phone and use the iPhone as a new iPhone, do not restore all settings from the iCloud back up, this does not works
I mean USA so just go to Amazon purchase a USB-C to USB a converter I have posted the link Below
USB C Female to USB Male Adapter (2-Pack), QianLink Type C to USB A Adapter, Compatible with Laptops, Power Banks, Chargers, and More Devices with Standard USB A Ports (Gray) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07S617LN1/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_eDrcEbB81AMP4

so far it works perfectly I have a been plugging and unplugging several times and each time it works flawlessly,
I assume the reason is because the USB-C to lightning cable is different with the Original lighting cable on the lightning side, you can see from the below picture it’s significantly bigger than the original one:

I assumed because Apple is using different chipset for this connection.
please post your feedback in this thread