calendar alerts not working on iphone. All notifications are enabled.

Since years, putting an event in the calendar means one thing for certain - I will miss that event because there are zero notifications, alerts, rings or noise on neither my Mac nor iphone. When I was PC+android, I never missed an appointment as the phone, watch and pc would shout, ring and not let me miss it.

Having lost a job because I missed the interview becase there were no alerts even though I had setup alerts, I checked the settings in the iphone (ios 13 now)

1. Under Settings->notifications->Calendar, "allow notifications" is enabled.
2. under "upcoming events" I have
   1. "allow notifications" on
   2. Alerts set to lockscreen, notification center and banners
   3. banner style set to "persistent"
   4. Sounds set to "by the seaside". In 5 years with iphone, this has NEVER played, even though I have hundreds of events in my calendar, each with an alarm reminder set.
   5. Badges set to true.

I setup a new test event in the iphone calendar app to start in 5 minutes. I set Alert to "at time of event".

I put the phone down and waited 5 minutes.

Nothing. No sound, no flash, no alert nothing appeard on my connected and superb garmin fenix 3 watch (Which gets all the sill social media messages, events etc).

I have been using iphones since the 4s. And have never seen any type of alert form calendar which I use for critical business events. I miss them all, and have lost hundreds of thousands if not millions of dollars as a result.

I have now started setting alarms using the normal phone alarm, but this only works for events which happen in the next 24 hours.

I need someone to write an app which allows you to create alarms for specific dates, and the iphone calendar certainly does not.

Note: as I am an outlook user, I have my main calendar sync with hotmail, but his should be irrelevant. I have about 10 calendars, most of which are for google apps accounts for varous companies, but again this should not make any difference as the events, and their non working alarms, sync across all my devices including mac (which only pops up a useless tiny notification window when an event starts which I NEVER notice - its useless as an alert mechanism where flashing screens and loud alarm sirens which dont stop till you acknowledge them are needed.