iPhone 12 Pro and CarPlay

I just went from an iphone XR to iphone 12 pro. i have a 2021 jeep wrangler 4xe (uConnect) with 800 miles on it. I just got my new phone and suddenly carplay freezes and shuts down until i unplug and plug my phone back in. i’ve tried restarting phone and car, restoring network settings, restoring phone settings, disconnecting phone from bluetooth and deleting it from the car, and many other things including a brand new apple cord. I am very frustrated and apple has no solution and can barely help and now i’m stuck w a new phone that all my settings were erased from and carplay doesn’t work. i’m on 14.6, siri on, carplay chosen in settings.