hello jonesjohnd,
You've walked through great steps to help isolate the issue. With the issue continuing when paired with a different iPad and after replacing the Apple Pencil tip, you'll want to continue with cleaning your Apple products. You can find those steps outlined in the following article.
How to clean your Apple products - Apple Support
If you continue to have issues after cleaning your devices, the steps listed below can be helpful in reaching a resolution. You can also find these steps outlined in the following article. While the title of the section that outlines these steps references a different issue, they can still be relevant for the issue you're facing.
- "Make sure to center your Apple Pencil (2nd generation) on the magnetic connector on the right edge of the iPad. For Apple Pencil (1st generation) and iPad (6th through 9th generations), remove the cap and plug your Apple Pencil into the Lightning connector on your iPad. For Apple Pencil (1st generation) and iPad (10th generation), remove the cap and plug your Apple Pencil and a USB-C cable into the USB-C to Apple Pencil Adapter. Plug the other end of the cable into your iPad.
- Restart your iPad, then try to pair again.
- Go to Settings > Bluetooth and make sure that Bluetooth is turned on.
- On the same screen, find your Apple Pencil under My Devices. If you find it, tap . Then tap Forget this Device.
- Connect your Apple Pencil into your iPad and tap the Pair button when it appears after a few seconds.
- If the Pair button doesn't appear, wait for one minute while your Apple Pencil charges. Then try connecting your Apple Pencil again and wait until the Pair button appears.
- If the Pair button still doesn't appear, contact Apple Support."
Connect Apple Pencil with your iPad - Apple Support
Let us know how that goes!