Activation lock help on iPad (4th gen) tried everything.

As outlined by Ingo2711, you are unlikely to be successful in removing the Activation Lock.

While perhaps disappointing, assuming that you do indeed have an iPad4 in your possession, you need to consider that the iPad4 is long-ago obsolete. It, along with other 32-bit architecture devices, are no longer supported. All 32-bit Apps have been withdraw from the Apple App Store - and many (if not most) online services that rely upon a web-browser won't work with the iPad. This model iPad cannot be updated beyond iOS 10.3.x (iPadOS 26 being current) and no longer meets the basic security requirements of modern web services.

As such, even if you do eventually resolve your immediate issue, the iPad will have limited utility - if any.

I cordially and respectfully suggest that you abandon attempts to re-use the iPad4 - and instead consider replacement with a much newer or current model iPad. This will be fully supported by available Apps and services for the enjoyment of its owner.

Sorry, but as you can see in this related article, proof of purchase is needed to get the Activation Lock disabled by Apple:

Additional Support - Activation Lock

Re: “Apple support said I can write a note saying it was gifted and they would put it through due to the amount of activity on the account from me resetting the password and removing the device but it was denied.”

Denial of the request in the absence of proof of purchase is to be expected. Even if someone else told you differently, they may not have been familiar with the criteria used by the Activation Lock security team.