Family sharing: cannot complete action

I'm having trouble with family sharing, stuck in a loop where my computer thinks there is a pending invitation from my wife, but when I click either accept or decline, I eventually get to an error message: Cannot Complete Action, you must have an invitation to join a family. I can't get past this screen when I click Manage Family from the icloud settings screen on a mac laptop. We got here in disbanding the family so that I could give up being the organizer so that my wife could recreate the family sharing as the organizer herself. To complicate things, we have a child under 13, so we cannot remove her from the family per apple's restriction on icloud accounts for children.

I've restarted the computer a handful of times and logged in and out of my icloud account. As an attempted workaroudn, my wife has re-invited me to join the family share, and whether I accept or decline, I still cannot get past the error screen. I think the problem is that I need to leave my current family group before I can join another one, however, I cannot get to a place where I can leave my current family group.

Help, anyone? Thanks.