Complicated backup and iTunes recognition procedure
We have an iPhone 8 with iOS 13. This was purchased after our iPhone 5S died a year ago. At the time we only had Mavericks running on a Mac and it couldn't sync with iOS13. I believe when we bought the iPhone 8 we first synced the 5S to iCloud in the Apple Store, then restored from iCloud to the 8 in the Apple Store. However, since then it has not been backed up. My spouse does not like "things being in iCloud where they are not safe", hence no more iCloud backups, and iTunes backups were not possible.
Yesterday I upgraded the Mac to El Capitan and iTunes to 12.8.3 (well, 12.8 something, the latest Apple offered for El Cap.). Connected the iPhone but of course even though the 5S backups from 1+ years ago showed, the new phone was not recognized. iTunes asked if we wanted to either restore the iPhone 8 from a 1+ year old backup or set up as new. Definitely not.
My thoughts: Talk my spouse into backing up to iCloud once now. Then connect the phone to iTunes 12 so they get to know each other and let iTunes 12 restore the year old backup since something has to be allowed to finish the handshake. Unplug from iTunes, then set up the phone to restore again and this time restore to the iCloud backup we just did. Connect the phone back to iTunes and backup to iTunes this time. Turn off iCloud backup.
1) Does this sound like what we need to do or is there a better way?
2) We don't want to do an iOS upgrade as part of this, but I presume the "forgot passcode" type of restore will only restore data, not touch the iOS?
3) I am a bit uncertain about what to do in terms of turning on and off iCloud backup, if and when. Clearly I need it on at times but I wouldn't want something horrible happening such as just after putting the old 5S data on the phone and then the phone trying to save that data as the sole backup iCloud holds before we can get the desired data back on. I think my spouse does use iCloud for contacts so then we'd be having different versions competing when we have the 5S data on the phone and her current versions in iCloud.
4) If we turn off iCloud backup on the phone what actually happens to the backup we just did? For that matter is the iCloud backup we did a year ago from the 5S still hanging around in iCloud just as my spouse fears?